After being hounded for a few months, I've finally formed my official street team, Goober Patrol. Can I get a Huzzah!?
. . . 
. . .
Anyone. . .
Anyone. . .
Bueller? 
***cue the crickets***

Okay, at any rate, here's what I'm looking for in Goober Patrol members:
-Must be active in social media.
-Familiar with my work (read/reviewed at least one of my novels/short stories).
-Enthusiastic about promoting your favorite authors (most importantly me).
- A genuine interest in seeing the R.I.P. series succeed.
-Trustworthy! Since you'll be privy to as yet unreleased work I must have confidence that you won't share unless specified otherwise.

What will you get in return?
-Special swag created for Goober Patrol members only.
-Exclusive first peeks at covers/snippets/teasers.
-A chance to give me advice or opinions on how you feel the series is going.
-A chance to beta read or receive ARCS.
-Daily interaction with me because I'm so damn cool! (This one might be more of a punishment than incentive.)


If you feel that you fall within these guidelines then please fill out the form HERE.

I think this team will be a great amount of fun! So please sign up to help get the word out about my fabulous undead and keep this world Goober free! 

Little Tchotchkes will be available for FREE as a stand alone.
If you enjoy this short story, it was originally published as part of the Paranormal Anthology with a Twist. It's a fun read and there were some amazing authors included in that project.
 You may click on the title to pick up a copy from Amazon.

Ah, the elusive book review. It's not uncommon to scroll through your news feed these days and see an author or two asking for one. I've done it. We've all done it. I'll bet you could pop over to Facebook right now and find a few. It might look a little something like this: 

Asking a reader to write a review seems like a simple enough request but most scroll right by these pleas without a second thought and I have a theory as to why.  The average person doesn't consider writing a review a simple task.

Committing your opinion to something in such a public forum can be scary. Thoughts of lengthy newspaper or television critiques come to mind. Palms start to sweat, panic sets in. Readers only think authors say reviews are easy because writing is what we do. Of course we'd think of it as a cake walk!  We pull extraordinary words out of thin air everyday, just like magic! 

While I hate to dispel the fantasy that authors are mythical creatures who summon forth words from the mystical realm in which they reside, the fear of reviews I'd like to squash.

After the cold sweats dissipate, you might be inclined to ask, "How can I help my favorite authors when even the thought of writing a review gives me the dry heaves?"  Allow me to put your mind and tummy at ease. Here are a few things to consider that might make the task less frightful:

1. You don't have to write a synopsis about the book. I'd wager most other readers will skim past that part of your review anyway. The authors definitely will. We wrote the book, hopefully we already know what it's about.  Rehashing the plot? Fahgettaboudit!

2. You don't have to explain the deeper meaning of the plot, subtext, or how the book was really a social commentary about the world we live in today. "I felt that by referring to the leading man's penis as the Empire State Building the author was subtly highlighting the corruption within the government which feeds our global materialism." Um, no. The author was simply being colorful with the English language rather than referring to a man's genitals as his "member"... again. 
This type of review? Fahgettaboudit!

3. Don't stress about your writing skills. No one expects any review on Amazon or Goodreads to be professionally edited. This is not a book report, per say. You won't be graded. Worried about posting a review because you're not a professional writer/editor/blogger?  Fahgettaboudit!

When it all boils down, you know what an author expects out of a review? 
Honesty.
That's it.
That's all.
Your review could simply state, "I loved this book. It was well written and the characters were cool." 
OR 
The non-author-ego-stroking review is also acceptable  
(although less popular)
"I didn't care for this book. It had too many Empire State Building references."

See? It's nothing fancy. When you find an author holding out their review tin cup on your news feed, that's all we're looking for. Simple and to the point. The truth is, reviews aren't literary monsters hiding under the bed waiting to devour readers who don't have the time to write a two page summary about every book they've read. 

When you really examine it, two sentences is all it takes. Those two simple lines may help another reader determine if they're willing to take a chance on an author who is unknown to them. When the stranger danger has been abolished, your favorite authors are given a chance to become someone else's favorite author too. And that's just good news all the way around... unless you're a hipster. 

Not looking so scary anymore, is it? So please take a couple moments of your day to jot down a few words about some of the books you've read. As authors, it means the world to us. And if you're still not convinced and need further encouragement, I have it on good authority that every time a review is posted, this happens...

Happy reading and reviewing!